Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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