I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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