we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize
