gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
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