Please don't use social media to get back at me.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Randomize
