Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Randomize