just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Randomize