I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just pee around me
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Randomize