And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Randomize