how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I had to cum in my sink.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Randomize
