did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Randomize