turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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