I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize