i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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