Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Randomize
