Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
