Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
