I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
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