Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
