you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
should my penis look like a turkey
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Randomize
