I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
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