Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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