I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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