Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
