you're like a bully in the Christmas story
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
