do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
