God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
did you just send me my own nude
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
