One girl and one boy is just not enough.
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
