I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
