Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
