I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize