just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
Is it because I queefed?
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize