i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Damn victory sex feels great
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
