It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
