I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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