That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Randomize
