Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
