he thought i was a dude.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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