a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
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She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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