Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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