shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I wish I only lived at night.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Randomize
