We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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