Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize