a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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