no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
