So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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