i jhust puked up my retainher.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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