Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Randomize
