Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
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