we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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